The Irish Farmer

An Irish farmer named Seamus had a car accident.

In court, the lorry company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning Seamus.

'Didn't you say to the Police at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine?' asked the solicitor.

Seamus responded: 'Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favourite cow, Bessie, into the...'

'I didn't ask for any details', the solicitor interrupted. 'Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?'

Seamus said, 'Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road....'

The solicitor interrupted again and said, 'Your Honour, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident, he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question.'

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Seamus's answer and said to the solicitor: 'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favourite cow, Bessie'.

Seamus thanked the Judge and proceeded. 'Well as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favourite cow, into the trailer and was driving her down the road when this huge lorry and trailer came through a stop sign and hit my trailer right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurt, very bad like, and didn't want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans. Shortly after the accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes. Then the policeman came across the road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and asked me, 'How are you feeling?'

Then Seamus turned to the Judge and the Solicitor : "If you were me, what the hell would you say?"

Reality

The Power Of Your Name

Surely children weren't made for the streets
And fathers were not made to leave
Surely this isn't how it should be
Let Your Kingdom come
Surely nations were not made for war
Or the broken meant to be ignored
Surely this just can't be what You saw
Let Your Kingdom come
Here in my heart

I will live
To carry your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
I will give
With the life that I'd been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your name

Surely life wasn't made to regret
And the lost were not made to forget
Surely faith without action is dead
Let Your Kingdom come
Lord break this heart

I will live
To carry your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
I will give
With the life that I'd been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your name

Your name
Is a shelter for the hurting
Jesus Your name
Is a refuge for the weak
Only Your name
Can redeem the undeserving
Jesus Your name
Holds everything I need

I will live
To carry your compassion
To love a world that's broken
To be Your hands and feet
I will give
With the life that I'd been given
And go beyond religion
To see the world be changed
By the power of Your name

Valentine's Day

Growing up, I always wondered why people make Valentine's Day a big deal.

American media portrayed Valentine's Day as a day where guys had to surprise their loved ones with a bouquet of flowers, usually a dozen roses, probably a box of chocolates too, a candlelight dinner, followed by a movie and stargazing.

As I started watching Japanese anime, I found it astounding how girls in Japan celebrate Valentine's Day. They bake chocolate for the guy they love through sweat and blood, wrapping it with a hug, sealing it with a kiss, hoping that the guy will truly accept their gift. 1 month down the road, on the 14th of March, if the guy DID accept the girl's gift back on Valentine's Day, he'd give her a box of white chocolates as as form of acceptance.

When I entered the "dating & courtship" game. None, I repeat, None of my girlfriends have every bought me anything for Valentine's day for the first 23 years of my life. Shear luck, I'd call it. Always looked forward to my own version of a Japanese girl.

Having said that, I actually reached the point whereby I considered Valentine's Day to be a once-in-a-year event where the Malaysian economy supports boys to spoil the ones they love getting nothing, NOTHING, nothing in return. Except faces of disappointment occasionally when they compare their gifts with the girls in their midst.

Well, that has always been my perception. As much as I truly despised Valentine's Day all the while, I have always tried my best to make sure my girlfriend (if any at the point of time) gets the best I can give (from my perception of course.) Yet for some, it still was not enough.

Well, the love of my life, Mei, taught me the true meaning of Valentine's Day, without saying anything. That is how this post was inspired anyway, as I was looking at our Valentine's Day pictures.

Just by looking at her on that day, I came to know that it is actually a day you work a little harder for that special person's smile,


After smile,


After smile,


After smile,


After smile,


Or to do something you usually cannot do, making that day truly special.

Laundry

Random strips from Cyanide and Happiness

Behold, the Lachesis.

Finally I convinced myself to purchase such an expensive investment.



Seriously it is far superior to the fucking retarded Copperhead.



Probably should have listened to my friend(dota queen) when she and all her friends pointed out that Copperhead is probably Razer's lousiest mouse.

I r' Upgraded!

Hypocracy At It's Best

I do not know about you but I have had my fair share of a hypocrite, probably the biggest in my life thus far. So much so even my mother tells me to stay away from him.

A lot of my real friends have been scapegoated because of this particular individual. Which is rather contradictory as he used to tell me how he only indulges in saying things upfront. But then again, he does, only he fears using his own name to state his claims. Therefore, he uses the names of other people to throw his point of view across.

But, nevertheless, this is done tactfully as this individual is not as stupid as we would hope. Allow me to demonstrate how his marvelous state of the art hypocracy is acted out.

Hypocrite: Hey, do you think that Edward is wrong for this and that (usually not important).
Scapegoat: Er.. Ok what? I do not think he is wrong.
Hypocrite: (Growing desperate to convince the scapegoat) Then he gets angry and throws his temper (Old school but still his favourite way of victimizing me) and all of you are ok with that?
Scapegoat: Ah.. A bit la..
Hypocrite: He should not say that right?
Scapegoat: Probably.

He then comes to me and says

Hypocrite: Eh Edward, scapegoat says you are wrong and you should not have done this this that that. (Self-claimed innocence)
Edward: But the scapegoat would not say something like that. It is not in his nature.
Hypocrite: I do not know la.. But he was in a bad mood that day so I asked him why and somehow he blurted this to me.

It took me many encounters to see through this lie. Yet another example of his cowardice hypocracy would be how he does not dare to use his own name when he is pinpointing his victims (or probably me only)

Sigh. It is truly sad that he once told me the world loves him more than me. Which did not affect me at all as the truth was already known to me.

I am glad to have known him. This way I know I am truly blessed not to have useless parents who know not how to raise me to grow up to be anything close to him.